schemes
2011-06-08 @ 08:47:06
As my life unstoppably goes by, I feel so attached to my past although I am not aware of that. There comes a moment when I realize how my life is interrelated to my parents. And this is not a happy conclusion at all.
23, teacher - like my mom, in a relationship with 24 year older guy, trying to compensate the lost contact with my father who I am ashamed of, this is all too sick to talk about and maybe too private but I have to write this to realize how my life became a scheme. The scheme of typical behaviors - Freud could have said a lot of interesting things about it and he would have probably said something about sexual fantasies.
I'm lost. Somewhere between my youth and adulthood. I die for the contact with my childhood which I barely remember. And I wish to go back to that place and change everything.
23, teacher - like my mom, in a relationship with 24 year older guy, trying to compensate the lost contact with my father who I am ashamed of, this is all too sick to talk about and maybe too private but I have to write this to realize how my life became a scheme. The scheme of typical behaviors - Freud could have said a lot of interesting things about it and he would have probably said something about sexual fantasies.
I'm lost. Somewhere between my youth and adulthood. I die for the contact with my childhood which I barely remember. And I wish to go back to that place and change everything.